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As a favor to a friend, I was asked to give advice to a college senior and fellow curly girl (yes!) on the working world and career options in the field of communications. After sharing my thoughts, it had me thinking about the journey we call life (bare with me for a moment).

I believe that part of our life lessons is to find, accept (for good and bad), and learn from ourselves throughout our different phases and stages. It may sound simplistic and easy for some of you to achieve.  I commend you! For others, it’s a lifelong struggle between pleasing people by acting in accordance to their standards and being authentic to ourselves. This spans our career choices, how we present ourselves to others, and what we say about ourselves.

As a people pleaser, I often find myself questioning whether I’ve agreed with someone because I truly concurred with their thoughts or if it was expected of me and makes that person feel better knowing that I don’t challenge their thoughts. It’s as if some influencers–loved ones, friends, and acquaintances–are dangling a box in which a mold has already been cast.

Now, I will advise you as I advised this young lady. Whenever you’re presented the mold, step away! If not, you will miss the opportunity to live a fulfilling life and achieve success doing what is in your element, what God has gifted you to do. It is your choice to forge your own path and embrace your true self.

I too struggle with this, so I’m reminding both of us today. Let us repeat Uta Hagen’s words and remember to overcome the notion that we must be regular. Yes, let your freak flag fly!

Have you been forced into a mold? Have you broken free of it? Please share your story.

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